Welcome back to Stile Project's reader mail section, where you, loyal reader, get to share your pearls of wisdom. Just make sure to wash your hands after. If you have something to contribute, feel free to e-mail me.

Older reader mail: 25 / 26 / 27 / 28 / 29 / 30 / 31 / 32 / 33 / 34 / 35 / 36 / 37 / 38 / 39 / 40 / 41 / 42 / 43

• From: Cristofer
• Subject: you suck the testicular cancer lymph nodes, stile!

This is the holy sand shrine of goatse the ass god. Cristofer, Waylon, and Brandon have constructed it to appease you. We tirelessly toiled in the hot maui sun for 2 hours creating this masterpiece, and should you refuse to post it, thou shall be smited.

• From: Jasen
• Subject: STILE SUX (Persian Goggles)

Attached here is a photo of my roomate on Thanksgiving day. He got so drunk that he got very agressive and was almost arested and went out of control and had to be restrained to a bed be using duct tape.

• From: Eric
• Subject: A TRUE HUMANITARIAN

here is a pic of the deer i shot on sat.. this shot proves that i am a true humanitarian. i am going to send the pic to PETA to prove that there is a way of killing that is painless....HEHE.

• From: Till
• Subject: i love you!

Dear stile, my wife is a whore and loves to fuck strange object! Here are a few of her pictures hope you enjoy! from orlandosubcouple

• From: Jonathan
• Subject: reader mail

Took this photo of my girlfriend before I knew about your site; otherwise she would have STILE ROX instead of the handprint on her right cheek.

• From: BJ
• Subject: my friend puking

Hey, here is a few pictures of my friend, after his Thanksgiving meal. He has this wierd thing where, when he gets drunk he likes to dance around the room with his blow up doll. He then likes to throw up all over my living room floor and call the doll demeaning and trashy names.

He wishes everyone a happy thanksgiving!

• From: Simone
• Subject: poop ship destroyer 2

My english is not too good, but I really like to tell you that I love you site. I am a 26 yo german gil and I love the funny and sometimes quite sick
pics and vids you show to the world, what might be, because I am a little bit crazy too.

To thank you for the fun you brought in my boring days, I want to say that I LOVE you and that I really want to be you slave because you are the toughest, cleverest and cutest guy on planet. My boyfriend ist nothing but a small dicked whimp compared to you. and, as you mentioned on your site, I will add some nude pic of me, of cause without telling my boyfriend ;-) I am nearly sure, that I am not, what you will call a hotty, but I hope you have a little bit fun watching.

Hugs and Kisses from germany,
your submissive little slut
Simone

• From: Kim
• Subject: Reader Mail (Spanish Medical website on Peyronie disease)

http://www.uroatlas.net/androl/peyronie.htm Ahh, The wonders of medical science. Hope you enjoy this you sick fuck.

• From: eddie
• Subject: reader mail

This past summer I was visiting a good friend of mine in southern California. Looking for something to do, we stumbled upon the Los Feliz Street Fair, or something of that nature, and I snapped these pics of the headlining band.

In the pictures you'll notice hardly anyone watching, which is dissapointing because they were quite talented. as it turns out the street was packed but there was a 40 foot semicircle of void in front of the duo. They truly rocked and didn't get any appreciation from the "non-stop parade of delusion" that is the populace of LA.

I've supplied the snapshots I took, and perhaps your readers would enjoy at least the visual portion of their stunning performance as much as I did.

Thanks Stile...
Been following you 4 years and counting.

• From: RaD Man [ACiD]
• Subject: ACiD with Stile...

Jay,

http://ansi.idledreams.net/convert.aspx?artworkid=20539

It's dawned on me that no one has notified you of our final ACiD Artpack release. Perhaps you want to contribute artistically or write
an article about your life in the BBS underworld.

Here's a link. http://www.acid.org/info/acid-100/index.html

Yes, I admit it. I used to be a doodleboy.

• From: Jetmo
• Subject: try this...

While seated make clockwise circles with your right foot.

While doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand.

What direction is your foot going now?

• From: Timmy
• Subject: sunk my nuts

Stile,

I thought you might be able to use my story to set some of these damn testicle jeopardizing/clamping/turning blue/hammering and strange piercing bastards straight.

I have never considered myself a lucky man but 2 weeks ago I was given an opportunity to experience something really truly shitty… Monday morning I rolled out of bed as per the norm but something didn’t feel right as I stumbled around progressing through the mundane routine that without thought somehow happens every morning before arriving at work.

As I stood in the shower this particular Monday morning I was wondering why my left ball was acting like I had mistreated it or something, like I teased it and it was getting back at me with a touch of mild blue balls? Usually my balls pull these little annoying stunts in harmony but this Monday it was clearly the left one acting up all on its own, being as I am especially incoherent Monday mornings I opted take the lazy way out and not jerk off just on my left nuts account. About an hour later I was wishing that I had as what I thought to be mild case of blue balls had progressed to a crippling case of what I still thought to be one ball blues, I guess? Now at work I decided to give in and duck walked down to the restroom where I fully intend to blow my load on the toilet paper dispenser just to ruin someone else’s day since mine was going so shitty thus far.

I will skip the self-degradating details of what happened in the stall but in the end I gave up on creaming the dispenser… mostly due to vomiting from testicular pain. At this point I became a bit worried but didn’t know what to do so like an idiot I walked back to my office and writhed in pain for about another half hour contemplating what I should do? The pain was continuing to get worse every minute, at this point I was in a pain induced shivering drenched cold sweet and as people walked by and asked “hey are you OK?” I would just tell them that I had an upset stomach and would be ok in a minute.

What was I supposed to say? My left ball hurts so bad that I am seriously contemplating using the large pair of scissors in my desk to cut it off because I am sure it would hurt less than this. So like a good little web junkie I look up EXTREME TESTICULAR PAIN online and of course most of the sites are blocked by my works firewall but I eventually find my way to a medical site that describes my condition perfectly! Apparently I have become subject to something called Testicular Torsion and it gets better, due to the twisting/clamping off of the blood supply channels you have 6 hours to get it untwisted or your testical DIES. Now the thought of a dead left nut put me into a panic and I realized at this point it had been about 3 hours since I got up. So off I went to the doctors where I was handed a form and told he would see me in about 45 minutes… FUCK THAT! I’m going to the hospital! So at this point I am now dry heaving from pain since there is nothing left to throw up and I feel a little faint as I get into the car and drive to the hospital.

I arrive at the ER and wobble up the desk and tell them I have a testicular torsion and need some help immediately! The bitch behind the desk laughed and asked me what I just said? I was about to choke her or so I thought, I fell down and threw up bile on myself since it got in my eye they got a little worried and after flushing the neon yellow acid out of my eye which I cant really even remember hurting so they took me a little more serious. They gave me a shot of something so I would stop throwing up and something else that had no real affect on my ball pain. The next thing I remember is being taken to the ultra sound room where apparently the only person that knew how to work the machine was a 60 year old woman who was having a little too much fun putting that electro goop on my balls but I was dozing on and off at this point so I didn’t care.

The doctor wrenched my nuts around some and then told me that I had to have surgery immediately… Then I woke up. My balls didn’t hurt! But I couldn’t feel my feet either so I was not too sure if I wanted to lift the blanket and see what was going on. I didn’t get a chance to check out the damage before this really hot little nurse walked in and told me she need to check the drainage and bleeding. Like the idiot I usually act like with hot chics ask for something, I said sure… I really wish I had not said that since when the blanket lifted I was wearing a blood soaked diaper with a hole cut in it to DISPLAY my cock and now gigantic balls witch they hadn’t even washed off yet so I had blood all caked up on my dick and yes my balls where still bleeding through 15 stitches on the left and apparently I got a bonus 5 stitches on the right ball as well for God knows what. It wasn’t the finest moment in my life as this hot little nurse put on a plastic glove and moved my pathetic limp blood crusted dick out of the way and stuck her face 3 inches from my balls just to say “Hmm looks like you are still bleeding huh?” this same nurse then came every hour on the hour to look at my balls which I have to say was better than having some dude do it but every time she came all I wanted to tell her was it usually looks better/bigger than that but thankfully I kept my mouth shut.

After the Spinal block and anesthetic wore off I was not a happy camper and that’s when they explained the entire procedure to me. No man should have to be told this. Well we had to take your left testical out and untwist all the blood this and that and semen/sperm this and that and then we put it all back in and stitched it the inside of scrotum so this cant happen again and just for good measure we stitched the right one in place too. Good news though we managed to save your left testical and we think it should be working fine again in about a month or two. Here is a thong with ball support baskets and a roll of gauze because it is going to bleed for awhile hopefully it stops before we see you again next week… take it easy and buy some jock straps for later when the swelling goes down you are going to want all the support you can get.

It took 6 days to quit bleeding and now two weeks later sitting here in a jock strap I am starting to think that they sewed them in uneven…. The left one is way higher than the right one. Other than one day getting to say some really great lines like “Do you perhaps like men with large scared balls?” or “Suck my mangled scared up balls bitch!” or “I sure am glad I had my balls are stitched in place, it was so annoying when they could move around”. I really think no good will/has come of this. I would have included some photos but it would not really do justice to the whole ordeal since I didn’t think to take any till the denial and swelling went down.

I would like to point out that I did nothing more than get out of bed and this happened. All you sick bastards that put your junk in precarious situations for fun should stop, because hurt balls is not fun… not at all.

Timmy

• From: Brendan
• Subject: stupid women

I know you pain Stile 'ol buddy. Maybe I'm just too fucking stupid to pick up on chicks that are interested in me or something. Everday I see redicuously fucking beatiful women, ESPECIALLY AT COMMUNITY COLLEGE. I generally spend most of classes gazing upon women that I swear to CHRIST are the most attractive in the world, dreaming that one day, one of them would come up to me and say three simple words, "hey, lets fuck!" or something along those lines... The thought of talking to women almost causes me to vomit and cry myself to sleep in a corner. Women are stupid, they have no fucking clue how much god damn power they have over us, after all, they control the pussy. What would someone like me even talk to women about? Goatse? Tubgirl? Bukake? My friends and I almost laugh so hard about that shit we almost soil ourselves. I dunno where I'm going with this...I'm just really horny and frustrated. You are the best, Stile. When I visit, I laugh, I cry, then I jerk off in the shower.

Your super best friend....

-Brendan

• From: Natalie
• Subject: you r gay

GAY SIGNS

1. If you are over 30 and you have a washboard stomach, you are gay. It means you haven't sucked back enough beer with the boys and rather you've been sucking-off the boys and have spent the rest of your free time doing sit-ups, aerobics, and doing the Oprah diet.

2. If you have a cat, you are a Flaaaayming fag. A cat is like a dog, but Gay: it grooms itself constantly but never scratches itself, has a delicate touch except when it uses its nails, and whines to be fed. And just think about how you call a dog..."Killer, come here! I said get your ass over here!" Now think about how you call a cat..."Bun-bun, come to daddy, snookums!" Jeeezus, you're the poster boy for GAY.

3. If you suck on lollipops, Ring-Pops, baby-pacifiers, or any such nonsense, rest assured, you are a Gaylord. A straight man only sucks bar-b-q ribs, crab-claws, raw oysters, craw-fish guts, pickled pigs feet, or titties. Anything else and you are in training to suck El-Dicko and undeniably a fag.

4. If you refuse to take a dump in a public bathroom or piss in a parking lot, you're in a deep homosexual relationship. A man's world is his bathroom; he defecates and urinates where he pleases.

5. If you drink decaf coffee with skim milk, you like a high hard one in the poop-chute. Coffee is to be had strong, black (or with thick, wholesome milk) and full-aroma. A pussy-eating man will never be heard ordering a "Decaf Cafe Latte with Skim" and he will never, ever know what artificial sweetener tastes like. If you've had NutraSweet in your mouth, you've had a dick there too.

6. If you know more than six names of colours or four different types of dessert, you might as well be handing out free passes to your ass. A real man doesn't have memory space in his brain to remember all of that crap as well as all the names of all the players in the Major league, NHL, NFL, NBA, college ball, PGA, and Nascar. If you can pick out chartreuse or you know what a "fresier" is, you're gay. And if you can name ANY type of textile other than denim, you are faggadocious!

7. If you drive with both hands on the wheel, forget it...you hungry for meat-popsicle. A man only puts both hands on the wheel to honk at a slow-ass driver or to cut the motherfucker off. The rest of the time he needs that hand to change the radio station, eat his hamburger, hold his beer, finger the beotch in the passenger seat (whoever she happens to be), or, if he's Latino, talk on his cell-phone.

8. If you enjoy romantic comedies or French films, mon-frere, vous sonnez le Gay, oui? The only time it is acceptable to watch one of those is with a woman who knows how to reward her man. Watching any of the above films by yourself or with another man is likely to result in SHC (spontaneous homosexual combustion), which is what happens to fags when they flame out too quickly. So follow the rules and beware...or keep that shit to yourself, you flamming faggot!

• From: Jetmo
• Subject: try these

In case all you casanova's run out of ideas.


Anal Boot [n] When you take a pitcher of beer, everyone spits in it, someone stirs it with their cock and then the mixture is poured through the crack of a man ass into the waiting mouth of the loser of a bet or Drinking game.

Australian Death Grip [n] The act of grabbing a woman by the haunches/crotch and staring deeply into her eyes until you're slapped or kissed. A recommended tactic for very crowded bars. Another great opportunity for wagering among friends.

Ball Sacking [v] streching of the scrotum over the face of someone sleeping or passed out, having a picture taken and posting it on the internet Beef Curtain [n] The shanked out remains of the labia after being stretched like Play-doh for an hour or so of jimmy-jam (aka Beef Drapes, Meat Tarp, Piss Flappers, Quim Nuts, Vertical Bacon Sandwich).

Blocking the Box [n] When you and your pal are double-teaming a chick - he's got her from behind, you've got her mouth. Selfishly, he drops his load in her, thus preventing you from using that input later (aka Access Denied Error, Road Closed Due to Bad Conditions).

The Bronco - Back to reality with this classic. You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab her tits and or a large lock of hair as tight as possible and yell another girl's name or state "Ya know your by far the ugliest girl I ever fucked". This gives you the feeling of riding a bronco as she tries to buck you off.

The Chili Dog - You take a shit on a girl's tits and then proceed to titty fuck her.

Chocolate Cha-Cha [n] Anal Sex. Used in a sentence: "John and George danced the chocolate cha-cha all night." (aka Driving the Hershey Highway, Riding the Dirt Trail, Utilizing the Third Input, Poking the Brown Eye )

The Cleveland Steamer - Mentioned below in The Fountain of You. After dumping your load on and around her chest--you position your ass just above your own pool of soup and sit in it, full weight, possibly causing her to gasp for breath. You then pretend to be pulling the whistle cord on a genuine Cleveland steam ship. As you make the loud noise you slide in your spunk from her chest to her bush smearing a spunk trail on her body in your wake. This can be done with the male facing either direction. The more authentic the steam whistle sound, the better.

Consolation Prize [n] When you take a girl home from the bar, thinking you're going to get laid, and from all of the drinks you've been feeding her all night long, she passes out on the bed right before you get your pants off. To get revenge, you jerk off and spray your load all over her back. Even though you lost and didn't get laid, the satisfaction you got is almost as good, hence the term consolation prize.

Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of someone nasty and you know you've got to give her the slip. However, you realize that your arm is wrapped around them. Therefore you must gnaw off your own arm to get out of the situation. Can be very painful.

Cum Dumpster [n] Refers to a girl who has been around the block quite a few times, hence she is full of cum.

DDF [n] Distance Distortion Factor - refers to someone who may seem attractive from far away but is ugly upon closer inspection - "good from far, far from good". Used in a sentence: "Woah, she's hot... wait a sec...ugggh major DDF!"

Dog in a Bathtub - This is a proper name for when you attempt to insert your nuts into a girl's ass. It is so named because it can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath.

Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before you cum, sticking your dick in her ass, and then punching her in the back of the head. This should give you a tremendous sensation, but for it to work correctly, the girl must be knocked out so that her asshole tightens up.

The Dirty Sanchez - A time honored event in which while laying the bone doggie style, you insert your finger into said woman's asshole, pull it out, and wipe it across her upper lip leaving a thin, shit moustache. This makes her look like someone whose name could be Dirty Sanchez. A very popular European variation of this maneuver called "The Hitler" involves a simple shit smudge under her nose, replicating the look of Hitler's mustache.

Felching - It occurs after you have been sticking your babe in the can, you bust your nut in there, back up and then pucker your lips up to her rim and suck out your ranch dressing. (This is also the first step of a very advanced maneuver called the Halmstad Hook).

The Fish Eye - From behind, you shove your finger in her ass, thereupon she turns around in a one- eyed winking motion to see what the hell you are doing. At that point, you have received a "Fish Eye."

Fishhook - A variation of "The Shocker" (an uninvited digit placed in the girl's anus ) in which, with the finger still up there, you "hook" back in the direction the pussy. No real purpose here other than to think to yourself while doing it, "ahhh yes the Fishhook......". Another variation called the "New Jersey Meathook" involves sticking your uninvited digit in the girl's anus while fucking her from behind. You finger is then turned upward toward her back and you pull her entire body toward you over and over while she is sliding on your cock.

The Flying Camel - As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl, much like you would imagine a flying camel to sound like. Strictly a class move.

The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before releasing. Then spew like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better in her bed). This is also a variation of the first stage of a Cleveland Steamer to be described later.

Fumilingus [v, n] When a man (or woman) performs cunnilingus on a woman and she farts directly in his face.

Furr Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty trollop who has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's afro, you don't mind though, that is until a mammoth furr ball gets lodged in your throat and causes you to beat the piss out of her.

Game of Smiles [n] This games involves men sitting around a circular table and a woman giving random blowjobs underneath the table. Anyone who "smiles" has to buy a round of beer for the rest.

Going to the Bullpen [v] The act of fingering the anus prior to having anal sex. It kind of "paves the way".

Goobin [n] One of the many wives had by an old-style Mormon who is not the main wife. The setup usually involves having your one "main" wife and the rest of your other wives who are strictly used for procreation. Hence "Goobin" - a bin for his goo. Used in a sentence: "Mary's one of John's goobins".

The Halmstad Hook - As mentioned above in Felching. This is a unique sequence of events named after a town in Sweden, where this apparently happens quite frequently. After dumping your spunk in her rear, the sauce is sucked out of the anus by the male. Once the sauce has transferred from her bowls to your mouth--the product that has been created is now known as "Swedish Cheese." The move is completed when the "Swedish Cheese" is transferred to the ladies mouth via a deep tongue kiss. You can cap this off with a swift stinging slap of her ass to show her how much you care and appreciate all her hard work.

A Hot Carl - A simple maneuver where you withdraw your shaft from the bowels of her anus and place it directly into her mouth for a cleaning. Apparently some guy named Carl first tried this.

Hot Lunch - While receiving head from a woman, (her, on her back, you straddle her chest) you proceed to shit on her chest--just for the hell of it. She then becomes the "Lunch Lady."

Jim Henson [v] When you fist someone and physically lift them off the ground. (aka The Muppett, Ass Puppett, Meat Puppett)

Kennebunkport Surprise [n] The act of covertly filling your cheeks with chunky-style New England Chowder, and screaming in disgust as you hurl it between your partners legs while giving oral sex.

Leave-in Conditioner [n] Dollops of semen strategically left in a woman's hairdo at a public gathering following fellatio. A good lesson for those who refuse to swallow the evidence Matching Drapes [n] Reference to whether or not a woman's pubic hair color matches the hair on her head. Used in a sentence: "Wow what a hot looking redhead, but I wonder do the curtains match the drapes?".

Mung 1[n, v] Two people dig up the corpse of the recently deceased. One undresses the mungee and places his mouth over the sexual area. The other backs up and does a running jump onto the corpses chest. The second person has to eat everything that enters his mouth. Insult, seen here in context: "I'm going to mung your grandmother!"

Mung 2 [n, v] What runs out the twat of a very pregnant girl who has been beaten on the swollen belly.

New York Style Taco - (Also known as a wet Betsy) - Anytime when you are so drunk that when you go down, you boot on her box. All the fixin's.
Paying the Rent [n] A position in which the woman is folded in half, knees above shoulders, while the man holds the back of her calves and bangs her ferociously.

Pearl Necklace - Whenever you cum on the neck area of a girl - it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry

Pet Shop - Inserting a small rodent such as a mouse or hampster in the anal cavity or if a woman is very stretched, in the vagina and left to roam around. The name comes from an English pop group

Pencil Sharpener [n] A chick who gives a rough and toothy blowjob that scrapes your willy up something awful.

Pink Glove - This frequently happens during a marathon session (maybe a second round) when a girl is simply not wet enough. When you give up and attempt to pull out to give her money or whatever, the inside of her twatsticks to your hog like the inside of a leather glove. Thus, the pink glove.

Pole Vault - Originated by ancient Romans. When the female has sucked your pole to the point of ejaculation she swiftly inserts the index finger of her right hand into your anus. This surprise causes a subtle popping out of the eyes, a natural arch to the lower back and extra propulsion necessary to clear the high bar. Bruce Jenner added this to his warm-up routine after losing to Sergie Bubka in the 1979 Olympics

Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and you pull your penis back slightly before poking it back into the inside of her cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to that of a purple mushroom.

The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when you start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those lulls in penile sensitivity.

Reading the Defense [n] The concept of a guy making a split second decision when in a situation to score with some chick when out without his girlfriend/wife. "Reading the Defense" refers to making all of the proper "game time adjustments" not to get caught cheating later on at some point. Having Beer Goggles makes it very hard to Read the Defense.

Redwings: (n.) One who has eaten a ragging chic out, has received his redwings. submitted by John F Rusty Trombone [n] The process by which one person is tossing a guy's salad, and then reaches around and gives them a hand job.

San Diego Surprise [n] The act of bringing a girl home and while fucking her, having a friend in waiting enter the room naked in hopes of a consensual threesome. Named by Navy guys stationed in San Diego. Rumored to work about one third of the time.

The Southern Trespass [n, v] The Southern Trespass most frequently occurrs when an over zealous (drunk) man is involved in intercourse with his lady friend. Through lack of concentration, lack of coordination, or simply because he wants to do it, the man quickly switches from the woman's vagina to the corn hole, without missing a beat. If executed properly, this act catches the female by complete surprise, stunning her like a cattle prod to the ass in a rain storm. No matter how long the man reaps the benefits of his efforts, he can now be content with the fact that he has committed the coveted Southern Trespass.

The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep and then jerking off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else.

Throwing A Pickle Down A Hallway [v] When you've just layed the pipe to some chick (usually fat) who has a big loose box. Used in a sentence: I may as well have just thrown a pickle down the hallway instead of fucking Fat Fanny's loose gash.

Tossing Salad [n] Licking another's anus. Done in prison as payment for drugs.

Tuna Melt - Lights out, you're down on a chick lapping away at an unusually juicy slab when you discover that it just happens to be the time of the month. A man of honor, by no means do you stop. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry smothers your face. (this only work with chicks who REALLY cum hard).

Tupperware Party [n] When three guys are triple-teaming a chick ... one with his penis in her mouth, another in her vagina, and the third in her anus. So named because she is sealed air-tight.

Twinkler [n, v] When you are 69-ing and she gags on your member and you can see her bung-hole pucker up.
Times Square Shuttle [n] You have two girls with you and they are in the 69 position with each other. You then alternately fuck each of them while they chow each other. You go from the missionary position on one and run to the other side and work in doggie style on the other one. Repeat as many times as necessary / possible. (aka Burning the Candle at Both Ends, Playing Ping Pong, The Gunga Din)

Valsalva [n] The act of pinching shut (with thumb and forefinger) a woman's nose while receiving fellatio; most effective when employed just prior to the release point due to the gag reflex and ensuing swallow that the woman is forced to do to continue breathing. A great first date ploy, as it sets the stage for what the rules of engagement will be ahead.